Ground Rules
First, you cannot "expect" anything more than to pay the lady for her time with you, either at a place mutually agreeable ("outcall") or at her place ("incall"). Anything else and you may be participating in an illegal activity. Prostitution is illegal throughout the US, with the exception of the legalized brothels in Nevada. Both client and escort are breaking the law.
The following two points are important to understand:
Money exchanged in legal adult personal services is only for time and discreet companionship. It may also be in exchange for certain services such as exotic private dance, modeling, role-playing or sensual massage.
But, of course, the male expectation/fantasy goes beyond merely meeting with her for an hour. We "expect" a sexual experience, which for most of us includes fondling and embracing, followed by her performing oral sex, followed by intercourse. If this does happen (and there is no guarantee that it will happen given the above parameters), then whatever happens is a purely a matter of personal choice and personal preference between two or more consenting adults of a legal age and is not contracted for nor is it requested to be contracted for or compensated for in any manner.
What To Expect
Do expect her to check your i.d. carefully. She does not want to get busted. Don't be surprised if she asks you to take off pants and shorts to expose your penis. She thinks that will prove you aren't a cop (although it really doesn't). Do expect to feel like a clumsy idiot standing there half-naked!
Do expect her to turn and leave if you use any specific words that can lead to her arrest. "Hey, babe, how's about a quick blow job?" will make most escorts leave quickly, both because those words describe an illegal act and because you'd be proving you're a crude dumbass. You can NOT use any such words...at least not until you both have decided you aren't with a cop and are naked. Then you can get more specific.
These initial moments are tricky. You both share common desires - you, sex; her, cash - but you also both share common apprehensions because this is an illegal activity, and for all she knows you're a cop and for all you know she is a cop. My suggestion to you is to let her lead the way here. After all, she's a pro and she knows the drill. To ease the way, you might even smile winsomely and confess this is a first for you. Another way to ease through those awkward moments is to sit next to her and gently touch her arm, slowly to a leg, and let things develop.
You've probably caught on that these safe-guards are all on her side: she is discovering if you're a cop, but you haven't an equal opportunity to discover if she's one. How to get around that? I suggest you deal with escorts you _know_ have been in business for a goodly length of time (you've seen their webpages for several months or more) and who have been reviewed positively in the various sites.
I've found that it helps ease her suspicions if I offer to meet her in the parking lot and take her through the lobby up to my room. I do that because if I were an escort, I'd find that trip through the lobby a bit awkward, but I imagine the professionals are used to it. Sometimes I've pointed out my car to show it has out-of-state tags, although I'm not keen on giving away that clue to who I am.
Do expect that she may, especially if she's from an agency, phone in to let them know she's there and that things are going well. Also Do expect that she will call after the session is finished to let them know she is OK and leaving for the next session or whatever.
Do expect to pay her for her time upfront, of course. The amount varies by region and by escort, but in general it ranges from around (in a place like West Virginia) to or more (in large cities or with one of the "super-stars"). Cash. She won't take your personal check. If she's wise, she also won't take your plastic (that can lead to a bust because it crosses interstate lines). Some will advise you to leave the money lying on the dresser, working on the premise that is less illegal than actually giving it to her. I'm not sure I perceive the distinction, but what the hell. Best course of action is to just place the money on a bedside table or hand directly to her without saying anything. Repeat don't say anything.
Do expect that once she has received the fee AND is satisfied you are not a cop (and/or not a crude s.o.b.), that she may go into the bathroom, often telling you to "get comfortable" which means you undress. This is a good time to put on all locks on the motel room door, if you haven't already done so. She'll return from the bathroom naked, or maybe in bra and panties. You can, if this is your thing, tell her that you want to undress her.
Do expect her to insist you wear a condom (or rubber, if you prefer that name). If she doesn't insist on that, I'd bail out on the premise she takes way too many risks. She will have one, but I suggest you bring your own, several in case one breaks or whatever. Not one that has a foul taste.
Do expect to treat her like a human being, not an object. Offer her a coke or a drink. See what she wants. Hell, be _nice_. In every walk of life and in every profession people who treat others with kindness, compassion and caring generally get better service.
Do expect her to treat you professionally. She sees you as a client, not her boyfriend. If you want moon/June romance, stick with a girl-friend. She is a pro and she knows about everything you can possibly suggest, so she'll do those things. Not ALL of those things. Most escorts will not accept anal sex ("Greek"), for example. But she will be ready for you to want oral sex ("French") or to put your penis between her breasts ("Russian") and such.
Do expect her to be ready to leave after you've climaxed once. If you are lucky and connect with a quality, professional escort she may well offer a second climax OR she may stay the remainder of the hour and offer to massage your back or just to chit-chat. Consider a "second chance" OR filling out the hour to be a bonus.
Do expect to let her know you appreciated the session, verbally and perhaps financially, if you feel so inclined. A tip, though not always expected is ALWAYS appreciated! Doesn't have to be a huge tip, I typically tip from - for a one hour session. More for longer sessions or "extra-special" service.
What Not To Expect
Do not expect anything without a condom. Plain common sense!
Do not expect to perform oral sex on her. Many escorts don't like that.
Do not expect deep kisses. Most escorts hate that, and besides, she's not your girl-friend you're trying to seduce.
Do not expect to insert your fingers in her pussy. That hurts.
Do not expect "Greek" or anal sex, unless she specifically mentions or advertises such a specialty. If available, it will generally be expected that you may pay an additional fee for the "extra" time.
Top 10 Client Tips
1. Make your first contact memorable. Be concise, honest, friendly and open. If you just want info (shopping?) be honest. If you want to schedule an appointment, suggest best time for you (don't say "How about some time next week?") Mention fee if you don't already know, but don't ask specific questions about it. Don't be graphic or specific-EVER.
2. Tell her a little bit about yourself. Tell her where you heard about her. Don't waste her time--she gets plenty of inquiries, make yours stand out. Talking on the phone or via e-mail gives you a great idea what's she going to be like in person. If she's friendly and nice, she will be in person. Its also your chance to start building her perception of you. Be respectful. These girls are PEOPLE. Treat them like you would a girlfriend or lover and they will respond positively. It sounds simple, but most guys are pushy and rude.
3. Now that you've made a good first impression, carry it through to the appointment. Show up! Be on time! Be freshly showered and presentable. Not too much "cheap" cologne, please. Be careful of doing anything that would scare her or cause her to be suspicious. Make a great in-person first impression!
4. Be confident and relaxed. Act like you've done this before. Greet her cordially. Give her a handshake (or, even better, a short non-sexual hug!) and smile and look her in the eye. Be nice--it costs no more and it will pay off in better dividends when it counts.
5. Place the agreed upon fee on a dresser or nightstand. Pre-counted and in a plain white envelope is always a nice touch. Don't seal the envelope. You may even hand it directly to her if it feels comfortable or if she extends her hand--but DO NOT SAY ANYTHING. Nothing. Just hand it over in payment for her time. Don't argue, ask for explanations, try to bargain, or otherwise ruin the mood at this point. Have a little trust and faith, you will be rewarded!
6. She will likely ask you if you would "...like to get comfortable?" This is your cue to disrobe completely. She will likely go into the bathroom, wait a few minutes and then return to the room expecting to see you naked on the bed. Make small talk and get to know each other for a few minutes. Don't be grabbing and making crude remarks. Everything in its time...
7. Talk to her--simple but very, very effective. Talk about her--compliment her attire, her hairstyle, her perfume. Whatever, but be honest--phoniness shows up quickly. If she asks about you be open and honest--it shows. Women like to relax and have a good time, just like you. Talking during the session relaxes everyone and makes it more enjoyable for all. Don't be pushy or grabby. Let her guide the session at her pace. You would be surprised at the improvement in service you'll get.
8. After you get to know each other a bit, she may stroke or rub you a little. Let it progess on its own rhythym. She is aware of the time and will make sure you get your business done in the alloted time. At this time, she may ask "What do you like?" This is your cue to explain in more detail what you like and what you'd like to get from the session. If you encounter a "No!" response, then just don't break stride and be sure that you respect her guidelines. If its really, really important to you then you might try begging just a little. Above all, accept her limits, treat her with respect and caring, and you will have a good session anyway.
9. Be a gentle and considerate lover. Women operate on a much more sensitive level than men to. Spend a little time on foreplay. Tell her when it feels good. Ask he if what you are doing feels good or if what you are getting ready to do is OK. Communicate and ask when you are ready to move on to the next plateau or position.
10. If the service was excellent and the company was superb, think about leaving a small tip to express your gratitude. Especially, if you are thinking of seeing her again. Depending on the length of the visit, a token tip of anywhere from to would surely be appreciated--figure this into your budget for the evening. I do know that this final step has served me very, very well.
11. Bonus Tip. The final thought here is to use common sense and civility at all times. The above points are mostly just that. Treat the girl as you would like to be treated--with respect, kindness, caring, and genuine sensitive feelings.
More General Tips
1. If you are browsing an online message board, say what area of the country you are looking in. Ask for recommendations in that geographical area.
2. Read the message or review board for a while just to get the flow of how things work before posting anything. (couple weeks, if you ain't under immediate pressure).
3. When asking for reviews or help on a messge board, it is always a good idea to also be a contributor. Post your reviews or start off your message with "I saw Sue in NYC and she was ...". Then ask your question. Just broadcasting "Someone tell me something about anything?" isn't particularly effective.
4. Remember that the escort may be a bit distant in the very beginning because she has at LEAST as many concerns as you do, like: getting busted, getting a weird/bozo client, getting a no-show,... etc.
5. To keep things level, on your 1st time out go with strong local recommendations, ask for "no-tip" price for a time period for companionship, do NOT get trick with detailed questions or cool/hip lingo, and relax and tell her you're a rookie up front and just enjoy the company. She'll take care of life, don't worry about it. See TBD's Lists as a starting point in your search.
6. Talk w/her by phone/e-mail prior to appointment if possible. Treat her like a person, treat her like a lady. People do business with people, here even more so than the rest of the world.
Glossary of Common Terms
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AKA - Also Known As |
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Asian - Oral sex on the anus of either sex (aka Rimming or Around-the-World) |
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Asian Cowgirl - Cowgirl with girl on her feet, instead of her knees |
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ATF - All Time Favorite |
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Blow Job (BJ) - Oral sex performed on a man (aka French Without). |
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Bare Back Blow Job (BBBJ) - Oral sex on a man without using a condom (aka French Without). |
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BBW - Big Beautiful Woman |
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BFE - Boy Friend Experience: Spend two or more hours together, have dinner or drinks, maybe a small gift, a little mutual caregiving, give a massage on occasion, being willing (if otherwise appropriate based on some good observations below) to give oral in addition to receiving it, and in general, make it a priority for the provider to have a good time in addition to the client. |
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Covered Blow Job (CBJ) - Oral sex on a man using a condom (aka French With). |
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Cowgirl - Girl on top |
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Cunnilingus - The act of stimulating the female genitals (especially the clitoris and vaginal lips) with the lips and tongue, or having one's genitals stimulated in this way. Cunnilingus is also commonly referred to as 'oral sex' or 'licking'. |
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Doggie Style - Man behind girl (standing or kneeling, penis inserted in vagina |
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DATY - Dining at the "Y". Also known as Cunnilingus (see definition above). |
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Deep French Kissing (DFK) - Kissing on mouth with tongue contact deep into throat. |
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Full Body Sensual Massage (FBSM) - Not usually full service; EXPECT only massage and HJ (see definition below), but more services might or might not be available. Also known as Private Viewing (see definition below) or B2B (Body 2 Body) |
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Fellatio - The act of sucking or licking the penis or having one's penis sucked or licked. Fellatio is also commonly referred to as 'oral sex' or 'sucking' or 'blow job'. |
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French - Oral sex |
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French Kissing - Kissing on mouth with tongue contact |
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Full Service (FS) - Intercourse to completion (with condom!) |
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GFE - Girl Friend Experience. Definition varies by provider. Refers to a type of session providing aspects of social and physical interaction beyond the act itself. Some ladies provide the GFE experience as part of their regular services, while others do so depending on the circumstances or not at all. |
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GFE - Girl Friend Experience #2: What it means to each person is a little different, but to most guys it means a provider that makes the experience seem unrushed, enjoyable, fun, relaxing and more like a "real date than a quick commercial encounter. In practice, though, it seems to depend on chemistry, personality and mutual expectations, as YMMV ("your mileage may vary") for both the provider and client. A general description might be: a multiple hour session that facilitates the experience, mutual cuddling/foreplay, mutual kissing, mutual oral sex (covered or uncovered--depending), and involves either the illusion or reality of passion on the part of the provider. |
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Greek - Anal sex (with Condom). |
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Greek Without - Anal sex without condom (aka "Death Wish") |
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Half & Half - A combination of both oral sex and intercourse. |
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Hand Job (HJ) - Masturbation by yourself or others |
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Incall - You meet the girl at her place---apartment or hotel room arranged by girl |
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In Search Of (ISO) - A message board post looking for something (a girl, a date, a TS/TV, etc) |
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Missionary - Man on top |
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Outcall - The girl comes to your place---your home, your hotel, etc.) |
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Porn Star Experience (PSE) - A session that gives the feeling of being in a Porn or XXX Movie. A date with a Porn Star. |
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PV - Private Viewing: The facts are that private viewings as a genre are NOT Full Service (in terms of what is generally expected within the term full service---see the section under TBD Client Guide concerning expectations if you have any lack of understanding.) Also private viewing is interpreted differently by different PV providers and implemented differently according to the client in many instances--many more than a FS escort. If you insist on Full Service DO NOT go to someone who advertises Private Viewing. Really simple. If you are happy with a "hands-on" approach (and likely hands only) then this may be a route for you. You will in all likelihood leave the PV "satisfied" and the PV provider WILL assist you in a hands-on manner. It is NOT a do-it-yourself experience. In some instances, french or russian lessons may occur but that is absolutely NOT something to expect. If language lessons happen consider your self blessed or lucky but DO NOT expect it and DO NOT plan on it no matter what one individual says--that is foolhardy at best. Also known as FBSM (see definition above) or B2B. |
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REQ - Requesting information |
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Russian - Penis between girl's breasts until completion. |
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YMMV - Your Mileage May Vary---May do things with one person, but not with another OR your experience may be different than mine for a variety of reasons. |
